November 18, 2011

Traveling Dreams

Recently I've found myself feeling desperate for travel. The idea of moving to a foreign place and indulging in new food, new friends, and a new culture is fabulously appealing to me. I've found myself daydreaming about packing a single suitcase with some vintage scarfs and pretty dresses and hopping on a plane to a new adventure. Part of me wonders if this is a reptilian reaction--a way of running from my problems or escaping the reality of life after school. I've never had much interest in being a tourist but I've realized that I am extremely interesting in living in new places. The fear and excitement bundled with the rush of being surrounded by so much "new" is absolutely exhilarating. I liken the feeling to something like jumping off the high dive. You know you'll be safe and have a blast but you're frightened nonetheless; the height seems insurmountable until you just make the leap and realize it wasn't so bad after all.

I've found that the bigger my blog has become, the less personal it is. Sometimes it's difficult to share your secrets with so many strangers--whether or not it is through a computer screen. I'm struggling with my future plans and I can honestly say that I have too many options right now. As a senior in college, everyone seems to have advice for me. Some of this advice is good while some is overbearing and unnecessary. I'm at a point in my life where I need to listen to myself rather than follow the plan set forth for me by my friends, parents, and well-meaning strangers. As odd as it may seem, by forging my own path I often feel as though I'm disappointing the people around me. It is not often that you find someone so determined to listen to their heart. I'm afraid of making the wrong decision and somehow finding myself "stuck. Stuck in a meaningless job or relationship. Stuck in my hometown or a strange city. Stuck with personality flaws.

So my remedy to these fears? Apparently my heart wants to solve all of my problems by dreaming of foreign places--Effiel towers, sandy beaches, crowded markets, and old brick buildings. I dream of cobblestone streets, historic monuments, and classic art. I dream of a place where I don't know anyone and cannot speak the language. I dream of fine food with names that I cannot pronounce and I dream of the adventure that is generally accompanied by a bit of loneliness. I never used to be a dreamer. My whole life I have been proud of the fact that I am a realist. But now that life is becoming a bit too "real" for me, my dreams are pushing their way back to the surface. If I let them win, I'd be on a plane tomorrow with my single suitcase in hand.

6 notes:

Ngaio May

I feel like you, I am wanting to travel and experience the world.
I live in New Zealand, and we have this cultural thing known as an OE - Overseas Experience. For Kiwis, once finishing Uni it is really common to head abroad for a while, back packing or doing a working holiday before coming back home to settle in. I think it is an age/life phase thing. Getting to the end of a hard earned degree and just wanting to travel.

I say, go for it!! No one ever regrets seeing the world! hehe.

Ngaio May xx

PS - New Zealand is an awesome place to visit! :)

steven andrew

This sums me up so much, it's crazy. I daydream about places I've never been to so often and I wish I could just pack and get away, even for awhile. I think everyone has that a little bit - but some are better controlled. We'll travel and get to see the world! :)

Malori

Ngaio May-- I would love to visit New Zealand. It would be wonderful to live in a place where seeing the world was a high priority! It just seems so romantic, you know?!

Steven-- I'm glad you can relate to me on this :). Sometimes I feel a little crazy, it's nice to know I'm not the only one who dreams about escaping for a while.

eef

if it's possible for you to travel now, i think you should. you won't regret it!

after college I moved to germany (i worked here: http://edelweisslodgeandresort.com) for two years. it was the best decision i ever made.

it would be much much harder for me now to travel like i did back then. money issues, apartment, boyfriend, trying to be an adult. all that stuff gets in the way now.

my advice is that if you really want to travel, don't put it off if you can do it now. you don't have to go for that long. backpack europe for a month or two. you don't need as much money as you think you do.

you of course need to decide what's best for you, but take it from me (and all of my jealous friends who never went traveling after college), its a LOT harder to travel after you've been in the real world for a while.

mel

I agree with eef in some ways but also not in others.
As someone who was actually 'stuck' for a few years in their life, I've learned that nothing is final.
People take choices and decisions so seriously & are so afraid of change that they put up with half-hearted existences.
It's never too late to change where you're at and follow your dreams. It's never too late to start a new career path, do a 180 and change your mind.
Life is not a race.

With that said, yes it is easier to make change when you have less responsibilities and commitments. Maybe you can combine goals and dreams? An internship overseas? A work exchange that lets you live somewhere else to satisfy that travel bug...
Just be warned - I've had 3 friends go to Australia and they've all fallen in love, gotten married and stayed. Don't tell that to your mom just yet ;)
Do what you want, what you feel you'd most regret if you didn't.
~mel
p.s. hurray for reality in blogs - i am guilty of that as well...

Claire Ogden Designs

I love this post Mal, I love the raw honesty and the feeling you have written with, nothing is set in stone we live our lives best we can, wonder along the path we chose, dreams are powerful things, some just dreams but make us who we are all the same, follow your heart and have fun, make the decisions for you, try the risks, be who and what you want even if it is only short lived. Things happen and change, dream and follow many paths but be happy and most of all be who you are! X

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