May 23, 2011

Dress Code Violation


Last week I spent the week visiting my family and taking a break from real life. I only had a week off between the end of the semester and the beginning of summer school and my internship. I decided to take all my summer school classes online so that frees up a lot of time, thank god! Anyways, last week while I was home I decided to stop by my high school to visit my favorite teacher (what up Boggsy!) This is what I wore...

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sunglasses: RayBan
top: Volcom (borrowed from mom)
skirt: Forever 21 (thrifted $6.00)

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One of my favorite things about not being in high school anymore is the fact that I no longer have to abide by a dress code. I don't think I dress inappropriately and I always hated the silly dress code rules (such as, no spaghetti straps allowed). Having said that, I have a little anecdote about my visit...

As I was being escorted to my old teacher's classroom, I heard a woman shouting "Young Lady!! YOUNG LADY!!". I turned around and realized it was the vice principal. She and her family are friends with my family (I've even vacationed with them in the past) and so she immediately recognized me. I laughed and said something like "you were going to dress code me, weren't you?" and she admitted that she thought I was a student. We exchanged pleasantries then she turned the topic back to my outfit. She told me that I really couldn't be wearing what I was wearing and asked if I had anything to put on over my spaghetti straps. I calmed explained that I wasn't a student and that I didn't have anything else to put on.
As we were talking, the principal walked up and got involved in the conversation (she is also a family friend). She began to tell me that what I had on was inappropriate and asked if I had anything else to put on. Again, I told her that I WAS NOT a student and that my outfit wasn't inappropriate. We went back and forth a few times--her telling me I was scantily clad, me explaining that I wasn't a student and did not need to abide by the dress code. The conversation ended with the principle telling me she "couldn't have me on her campus looking like that". She told me I could either change clothes or come back another day in a more appropriate outfit. So, she had me escorted to the nurses office so I could change clothes before I was allowed to go upstairs. I had driven my mom's car so I asked the nurse if I could see if maybe my mom had a sweatshirt or something in the car--luckily she did so I threw it on and was allowed back on campus.

Honestly, I left the campus feeling extremely offended. As silly as it is, I felt like I was in high school again and was kind of humiliated. As I walked to the nurses office, I definitely had to take some deep breaths and tell myself not to cry (silly, I know, but I'm a crier). I was shocked that they made me change my clothing and I wonder if I had been a parent if I would have been treated the same way. It's been almost a week since the incident and thinking about it now I'm still sort of embarrassed. So here's my question to you, wonderful readers. Do you think that my outfit was so scandalous that I should have been asked to change or to leave campus? Did you have dress codes at your high school? How do you feel about dress codes in general? I'd love to hear your take on it.

xoxo
Mal

Oh! P.S.

I always love when you all leave me comments and every time I get a comment I try to add another blog to my reader. Sadly, I don't have time to read hundreds of blogs every day so I had to find a new way to connect with all of you fabulous readers! So... I've gone back to replying to your comments...in the comments. I used to do this when I first started my blog, but for some reason I stopped. I'm bringing it back!!

18 notes:

Ashley

That is so silly! There is no way they would have treated a parent like that! If you aren't a student I don't see why you would have to abide by the dress code anyways. So lame!

I probably would have cried. I am a BIG crier.

naomi:

wow, that's crazy. i don't think you were dressed inappropriately at all. i mean, you weren't dressed scantily or suggestively. i understand the dress code for students (my old high school made a dress code like two years before i graduated and THANK GOODNESS. girls would come to school wearing hardly anything and all sorts of body parts would be showing. ugh.), but for a visitor to be asked to change clothes or leave? that seems...extreme. i mean, if you wear dressed revealingly, i could understand that. i would have felt offended as well. (and i probably would have had to hold back tears too! haha). oh well. sorry for the rather rude experience, dear. i think you looked cute :)

Alex

That is crazy talk. We had a dress code at our school not that many people followed it. Your are not even a student there. BTW I think your outfit was fabulous.

Hannah

That's crazy. Your outfit was lot more appropriate than some of the things girls wear at my school, which abide by our dress code. I highly doubt they would have treated you the same way if you were an adult. I would have been really offended too!

Malori

Ashley-- As I was typing this post I was thinking about a post that you had made when you said you were a crier! I hate that I do it but I love that I'm not alone :).

Naomi-- I ABSOLUTELY see the need for a dress code. I just don't think it should be enforced for visitors to the school (unless, of course, they are wearing something completely inappropriate).

Alex--you're a doll :). Thank you so much. I felt pretty fabulous ;)

Malori

Hannah-- The teacher I was visiting told me that she could have easily sent at least 5 students from her class down to the office for dress code violations if she was REALLY going by the book. I feel like as long as you're covered up that it shouldn't be a huge issue. Thanks for your input! Great point :)

Simonette

we did have dress codes back in high school but it only applied to students - and you're not! ;-) unless you're inside the church (or a catholic school, perhaps), i don't find your outfit inappropriate. you were just visiting! not sitting in. haha :D

Danielle

Oh Malori, I almost got dress coded as a coach during badminton season at Hamilton, so I get it. I felt like I was 17 again. SO ridiculous.

ilene @ muchloveilly

bummer of an experience. oh, well - you look so cute. love the skirt!!!

Danielle

reminds me something that would happen if i visited my high school. that's totally lame though; you look so cute! love your skirt :)

Anonymous

That skirt is adorable. Not an innappropriate outfit at all - my school was the same! xo.

Malori

Simonette--I didn't really think of how strict Catholic schools are!! I went to a public high school so our rules weren't quite THAT stringent :)

Danielle-- I'm glad I'm not the only one. I guess Arizona schools are a little silly.

Ilene--Thank you :)!!

Danielle Ryan--Is that a sign that we shouldn't visit our old high schools? lol, thank you!

Kate--That's looking like the consensus!! I guess I'll have to be more careful next time.

Unknown

That was totally ridiculous! Honestly, I think dress code should be further down on their priority list. I understand wanting students to dress decently but there was nothing wrong with your outfit!

brlracincwgrl

How terrible! I don't think your outfit was inappropriate at all, and you being an adult shouldn't have been asked to change clothes. That's absurd!

My highschool had a dress code as well. Shorts had to be a certain length, no skirts above the knee, no spaghetti straps, etc.

alyssa johns

power trip perhaps? they would not have treated a parent that way for sure and your outfit by no means called for that kind of treatment! take it to the news!!! ;)

Malori

Lillian--another great point! I think there are many more important things to worry about than the attire of your visitors to campus. Silly high school.

Brlracincwgrl--I feel like most high schools have dress codes, and I absolutely agree with the idea of a dress code. I just don't think it should be enforced for visitors to the school.

Alyssa--I laughed out loud when I read your comment. TOTAL power trip hhaha. You're hilarious :)

Donna's Decembers

Hey Malori!

As a high school teacher, I deal with dress code EVERY DAY. I struggle finding trendy clothes that are work-appropriate.

I have to say that I side with the principals on this situation, and I'll explain it to you.

The American concept of high school is that it is a professional setting in which students learn how to become adults (or at least try to). Because of this theory, students, teachers, and all visitors must treat it as a professional atmosphere in efforts to boost maturity, conservatism (not politically, but mannerly), and restrict distraction. Even though you are not a student, the code is for EVERYONE in the school. You being in the building as an alumn is no different than a parent coming into the building dressed in the same way. Sure, you weren't staying long, but neither would parents. Parents must abide by the same policy because it shows respect for the establishment, what they provide for the students, and what it means in our society.

Also, it's the same thing has not being able to smoke or use any kind of tobacco product on a public school campus even if you're 18+. You just can't do it because it influences the youngsters.

See what I'm saying?

Malori

Liz--I absolutely understand where you're coming from. I think my issue was more with the way the situation was handled then with the rules themselves.

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